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Ka tu te ihiihi – Stand Fearless

This can be a very hard thought to get your head around and I am not sure if any individual really ever will. There are times I know I have definitely thought ok I am there and I stand fearless in my life and what it can bring to me but as soon as I get to this place something comes along and pulls me back a step or two. Whilst this can be frustrating I don’t believe that it is a bad thing. It helps me to stay grounded and it helps me to appreciate my life and the World around me. I have learnt that I must embrace the challenges, work on them and build the courage to keep pushing through and use these hurdles as building blocks to a better me and life. But how have I got to this point of being able to use these occasional negatives as positives?

Well, if we are to break this concept/idea down we can discuss a few different points that I think are most important in helping us become fearless and learn how to attack the World in a way we can learn from hurdles, build our mental strength and move forward.

Learning from hurdles is probably one of the hardest things I have had to learn to do. I would say I’m a mentally strong person but we can all have our times of weakness and they tend to come on much stronger when you are having a moment of weakness. So what have I learnt to do?

The biggest thing I was ever told was to only try and control the things I can control as the rest is out of my hands. This I found wayyyyy to difficult. I am not a controlling person but I do like to be in control – if that can make any sense at all. I find it very difficult not to chase something or try and mend things, so learning to sit back and let things roll that I could not control, that may take place or may not take place was almost torture at times.

Hurdles created a place of great unknown, and for me they really pushed my mind to try and tackle its inner thoughts in ways I had not had to before. I would say it was not necessarily the hurdle I found hard it was battling with my inner thoughts on how I wanted to situation to turn out that was more the issue sometimes. But what I have learnt through all of this is that a hurdle is a place to learn, take in your thoughts, shuffle through them and not to make any rash decisions. Hurdles are a place of learning and a place of growing yourself, your mind and body. When you can learn to come out of the other side then the growth you have been through is one that can not be replicated in any other way.

stand fearless

Mental strength is always a tough area to discuss because people still find it a taboo subject. Whilst it can be a topic people do not like to talk about I think it is so important to address how we are feeling and what is going on in our minds. For many years of my life I shut my mind off and only kept my feelings inside. This I now know was not the best thing to do.

Our minds are very clever things and they are so complex. We can be told one thing one moment and another the next. This creates a whirl wind of emotions and feelings within ourselves. If these feelings are not discussed or let out then they can become even more encompassing, confusing and detrimental to our mind and health. When we are trying to decipher how we are feeling I think it’s important to look at three things; reality, pressure and feelings.

Reality looks at how we are feeling and how it fits into our everyday life. If there is something external that is making us think the way we are. Have we seen or heard something else that has made us think that the way our life is doesn’t fit up to how it should be. Is it the sunshine and rainbows we see on the TV or the ‘perfect’ life our friends say they have. I’m sorry but this for sure is not going to be the full story.

Pressure, are there external pressures being put onto us to do a certain thing, live a certain way or abide by rules because that’s just how it is and right now we don’t have any other choice?

Feelings, this is by far the most complex and probably one thing I will never and I don’t think anyone will ever be able to fully understand. Like I said before our minds are very complex things and we can look inside our head as much as we like to try and figure out how we are feeling but the thoughts we are feeling are almost impossible to sift through and figure out if we are not talking. The process of talking or even writing things down allows our brain to discuss through and file away parts of our thoughts. It’s almost a way of rationalising things to ourselves.

Of all of the three above I do not believe there is any one that is more important than the other. In order to be able to move forward and look at being able to attack our lives and overcome hurdles and stand fearless I think we have to address all areas and work with an open mind.

Life is one very confusing ride and one we all have to take ‘alone’ whilst being with family, partners and friends. By ‘alone’ I mean we all have our own heads, minds and bodies and ultimately that is where we live. We have people beside us but we truly live for ourselves.

My biggest lesson and I guess what I have been trying to say through my ramble is that to be able to stand fearless we have to work on ourselves, our minds and how we are able to process and look deep within.

Standing fearless is ultimately the place of growth and building.

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